Small communities are ideal for some teens.
Jennifer, each child's situation is unique - for some teens, they may be apprehensive about moving, others may be willing to go
Ok, moving on. This is a touchy subject that was also raised many times with us.
JudyM, that would be part of the info that is gathered in your homestudy, and a prospective child who likes/wants to be around animals would be considered.
Judy, Abbotsford is big city now. Seriously we have over 160 teens in the Lower Mainland. Some of those are in Abbotsford.
A reminder that we have a Teen Adoption Orientation session on Feb 7 from 7 - 9 at our office in Burnaby. Check out www.bcadoption.com for details
Yulia I think we missed your question. Only saw that it was "a touchy subject raised many time" but no question
oh sorry... the question was -- What if the teens want to stay in touch with their birth families?
Teens and their adoptive families are incouraged to stay connected to family and friends who are important to them. Teens come with a circle of friends and family well established.
Thanks, got it now. This is called openness in adoption, and it is a good thing!
Openness is always done in a way that is safe and healthy for the child or teen. Most of the time it means staying in touch with grandparents, brother and sisters and former foster parents.
Yes, connection to the youth's cultural/ethnic/social/religious community is important. Continued connection to birth family also means that the child doesn't have to lose one family to gain a forever family.
This topic is pretty complicated for a short answer. yes, teens do find all of this confusing and needs lots of support as they navigate all the relationships.
Jada, that would depend on each child. There can be more or less formal openness agreements reached at placement.
Adoption is about getting more not loosing something or someone the teen already has
Jada, remember that the teen already knows his or her family. Some teens don't want to visit for a while as they get to know their new family.
Jaime remember that teens being adopted are in permanent care of the Ministry. They already understand that they will not be parented by birth parents, but that doesn't mean they still can't have some relationship.
Dawn, I beilieve that there are post placement visits. Karen, do you know more about this?
Dawn, there are many examples of opennes and no cookie-cutter approach. It is a tailor-made plan for each family.
me teens come with only one or two somebodies in their life and others come with many.
I will go out on limb, Jada, and say no. Remember that the birth parents no longer have parental rights.
Jada, adoption is not about co-parenting. Legal rights are transferred to the adoptive family. In reality though it is less black and white for some teens. It is important that adoptive families work through the opennes with the birth family, siblings or foster parents.
A question from Christy here.
If you think about entering a marriage, you don't stop seeing friends & other relatives
For sure! Sometimes this behavior is a way of testing the commitment. "IF I stay out past curfew, will they send me away?"
Yes, I live with 2 teens and one young adult and they hate rules. Some teens will come from group homes and boy they have a lot to learn about living in a family.
Many teens have very little experience with living in a healthy family and will need time to learn how to do it.
Remember, both the teen AND the family will have to adjust to a new family structure. It doesn't mean changing your values, but it does mean a lot of talking things over.
Some teens just haven't experienced that a parent's rules are there because they are loved, not because parents are trying to control.
Ok, we only have about 5 minutes left, so we have time for two more questions.
please post our website and toll free n umber
Think that will depend on the individual. AMy was an only child, told us she wasn't that keen on 'younger kids', but absolutely fell in love with her younger sisters and bonded very strongly with them.
Some do and some don't. We have some teens who would be better in a home with no other children or no other younger children.
Thanks Susan. That was our last question actually.
call us locally at 604-320-7330
Anyone with a homestudy might still be able to get into our Teen Adoption Education program starting tomorrow night. canll for more ino
Thanks very much, Susan and Karen. Great answers! I am sure all of us have learned a lot. This wraps up our live blog on teen adoptions. We apologize for not getting to all questions. Thanks for your participation!